Marriage... None of My Business

I'm occasionally asked whether or not I support gay marriage.  If I say "Yes I do." I'm going against God and nature.  If I say "No I don't."  I'm a bigot and a homophobe and tough shit anyway because the Supreme Court says it's legal so... up yours hater.  I usually say what I really think which is, it's of no importance whether or not I support gay marriage.  It is more important to ask if a gay couple's church, synagogue, temple, shrine or other religious institution supports it.  Why?  Because marriage is a construct of religion, not anthropology, sociology or government.

That last one... the government... is especially true.  The government should have NO business deciding who should or should not marry.  They wormed their way into it during the days of the industrial growth of the U.S. and its corresponding population boom.  The government wanted to ensure "morons, idiots, defective or retarded persons" along with other vaguely defined "low grade persons" did not marry and breed because, remember, in those days the vast majority of breeding was done shortly after marriage.  It was the societal stigma of sex/childbirth out of wedlock that sent folks running to the preacher to get hitched and sanctify sex.  All you needed back then was a preacher, priest, rabbi, imam... what have you, and you were set.  

Problem was, there was no check on who was fit to marry and breed.  Congenital birth defects could be passed down.  Relations as close as first cousins could interbreed, causing increased birth defects and genetic weakening.  Diseased persons where marrying and passing the diseases to their offspring.  These children were then perceived to weaken the broad health of the American public and burden the social infrastructure, primitive as it was.

So the government saw fit to step in an apply rules to who could get hitched.  Tests had to be run.  Medical exams administered.  Intelligence tests established.  This led to the issuance of marriage applications turned (hopefully) into marriage licenses which could be taken to a religious leader empowered to perform marriage rites or to a Justice of the Peace for the secular.  This was how government wormed its way into a practice that is not theirs to administer.

That didn't matter.  Once you turn on a government function, you can never seem to turn it off.  More insidiously, once the government set the precedent of being the decider of who gets married and who doesn't, they also became the place to go to appeal unfavorable marriage bans.  Long held societal bans on same sex marriage or polygamy began to be questioned and the government became the authority on permissible marriage arrangements.  It also began to codify preferences for married people.  Ostensibly to bolster the institution of marriage and a corresponding uptick in the population of native born Americans.  This manifests itself in legal protections, tax benefits, child subsidies for families... on and on.  Others that were banned from legally marrying but who lived as married, wanted some of those cookies and treats as well.  Most of my experience watching the debate for legalizing same sex marriage appeared less about validating love and devotion through a societally sanctified bond as much as it was about tax breaks and incentives.