The Boot Snake Latrine Incident

Anyone who has served in the military in the last 60 years will know what "bloused boots" means.  For everyone else... bloused boots is the method of drawing up the trouser cuff and either tucking it into the top of the boot or (as I prefer) rolling it under an elastic band around the lower calf, above the boot top.

Our fatigue pants have a drawstring in the cuff that makes this easier and more secure.  Don't want the pant legs coming untucked.  Occasionally though, the drawstring slips out and we call that a boot snake.

I was in the latrine after lunch; having just finished my business, when I glanced down and saw a boot snake.  I bent over and tried to tuck it back under the elastic band but it would not cooperate.  I began muttering to myself,  "Dang you... c'mon!  Get in there.  I mean it.  Can't walk around with you hanging out."  I finally succeeded in getting the string tucked back in and the boot blouser band gave an audible "thwack" as it snapped back.  I opened the stall and was heading to the sinks to wash my hands when I noticed two gentleman watching me; hands motionless in the act of drying their hands with paper towels.  I stared blankly back for a few moments then realization dawned on me that they heard my muttered comments earlier.  I tried to think of some funny remark but decided to just go.  Sometimes all you can do is just go.